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If you’ve ever partnered with another business to “cross-promote,” you know the idea sounds fantastic on paper: I’ll introduce my audience to you, you’ll introduce your audience to me, and everyone wins.

As a Community Builder and Certified Value Builder here in the Denver Metro area, I’ve worked with hundreds of small business owners who spend a lot of time networking. We all know the drill: coffee meetings, referral groups, business cards, and mixers. But here's the truth that doesn't get talked about enough—if your business isn't built to last, no amount of networking will move the needle long-term.

I see it all the time—people show up hoping for a magic referral or an instant client, but they haven’t done the relationship work. And without that foundation, it’s just small talk in a loud room.

Here are five essential principles I’ve found incredibly valuable when it comes to creating a network of trusted connections—especially here in the Denver Metro area, where personal relationships can open more doors than a polished pitch ever will.

If you’ve ever sat in a networking meeting and heard someone say, “I’m in mortgages and I’d like to connect with financial advisors,” you’ve probably also heard… silence. Or maybe some polite nodding. Maybe even a business card exchange. But rarely does a statement like that result in meaningful introductions.

When I walk into a room full of business owners in Denver, there’s often a quiet pressure to network: to scan the room, remember who needs a CPA, who needs a realtor, who I should connect with whom. It’s easy to slip into that transactional mindset of “Who can I help?” and “Who can help me?” But here’s the truth I’ve discovered: The best connections often happen when I stop trying to network.

When it comes to networking, it’s easy to get caught up in the numbers—how many events you can attend, how many cards you can collect, how many coffee meetings you can schedule. But if you’re like me, you know that more isn’t always better. Better is better.

If there's one lesson I’ve learned time and again in business—and in life—it’s this: you can’t build a network when you need it. By the time you're in a crunch, it’s too late to start making introductions or building trust. That’s why I always say, dig the well before you’re thirsty.

One of the smartest moves you can make is to sit down with a few trusted people—mentors, advisors, peers, even longtime friends—and just talk through your business. No pressure. No pitches. Just thoughtful conversation and outside perspective.